Everyone changes, but how does one grow? What is the difference between the two, and why does it matter? No one is entirely the same at 10 years old as they are at 20, or 30, or 70. Lived experiences, human interactions, and cultural zeitgeists all inform one’s identity. To shape your identity through growth and not just change grants the freedom to be one’s true self.
Through the years, people change how they look, how they spend their time, the music they listen to, and the people they spend time with. For many, looking back at old photos or reading diary entries may cause wincing; the changes one has gone through since that point create a disconnection. Is the newer version inherently better? Or is it just different?
With change, a sense of superiority may come, but is it truly justified? The person you have been before informs who you are now, and should not be reflected as cringey, even if the similarities between then and now have dwindled.
As I change, I have reflected with a tinge of embarrassment or even in the most extreme cases, resentment. Like others, I have been through a multitude of different stages. Hot pink hair, long bedazzled nails, and more natural aesthetics were all part of my identity in the past.
Simultaneously, my interests change alongside my look. Different music tastes may influence outlook; courses at school and current news cycles shape what is relevant. Two years ago, I barely read three books in a calendar year, but from the start of the year to now I have already read 12. The exposure to ideas larger than one’s immediate circle of influence is an opportunity to reshape identity.
The flexibility of time and finances also plays a large role in the freedom one has to be able shape their identity. During my junior year of college, I was involved in so many clubs and organizations that I had meetings every night of the week, events, work, and school. I was super busy and as a result, had no energy or time to develop myself from a broader lens.
As I grow older, I have been able to actualize the difference between change and growth in my life. Changes have been, at the root, caused by expectations that may or may not actually exist, traditions which form a certain path many follow, and trends (the amount of different water bottles that have been “the next best thing” in the past five years is absurd).
Growth, on the other hand, has come from a rejection of expectations and a pursuit of true interest. These shifts do not come from a place of ego--quite the opposite. In recognition that one will never be fulfilled on the never-ending road of trends, it is paramount instead to turn inward.
Do you actually like that water bottle that is trendy, or does the one you already have work well enough? Reflect on who you are and what you want to achieve. In this search, a new path will be illuminated, a new path of growth.
